A “Clemson Wins The National Championship” Limerick

I am sure that I have never had more riding on a single game than tomorrow’s National Championship game. I am extremely emotionally invested and I have a little action with a nice pay day if Clemson wins.

If my best friend from college, B Brown were still here with us, I am sure we would be at the game in Tampa with his boys. I have been thinking about him a lot lately and wishing I could be watching this game with him. The Tigers meant everything to B Brown. His Clemson Pride was immeasurable. I am sure I will hear him screaming all through the game. Arleen will be giving up her angelic perch on my shoulder for him. Mimi will be a maniac like B Brown on hers.

I don’t think that I have ever cashed on a proposition bet like this. I’ve made bets on the Cavs to win the NBA championship before and the best I ever did on them was Game 6 Eastern Conference Finals vs MJ. No. I liked this bet when I saw it. Clemson had too much talent coming back. They are +180 to +220 today which is roughly 2 to 1. I have them at 7-1 for $100.00.

The anticipation is beginning to build.
Will Clemson’s championship dream be fulfilled?
To be Champs and win a bet
Would be as good as it can get…..
And this Old Tiger would be doubly thrilled!!!!

A Bringing Home A New Baby Limerick

A young friend of mine from the Houston Clemson Club and her husband just celebrated the birth of their first child. I have known these kids for a couple of years and they have been good Clemson buds, which is something that I cherish since Clemson is so near and dear to me.

Knowing that they were going to be busier than they have ever been before in their young lives and that they were going to have tons of visitors coming over to see their precious bundle of joy, I baked them some cream cheese pastries for their guests. Being the classy Tiger that the new mom is, there was a thank you note waiting for me when I returned from being out of town last week.

I know that this is an all new experience for them and it requires a lot of OJT. With that, I offer this advice –

When you’re changing diapers that stink
It’s pretty easy to think
How long’s this gonna last?
Just know they grow up fast…..
And my advice to you is DON’T BLINK!

A “Best Advice For Incoming Clemson Students From Those Who’ve Been There” Limerick

I am a very proud alum of Clemson University. I entered there in the Fall of 1970, the year that Clemson introduced THE PAW as its logo. It was a time of great social change in the United States and some of that change found it’s way to western South Carolina. It was unofficially the end of “Rat Season” which included a tradition of incoming freshman men cutting their hair to a sixteenth of an inch. That had me a little worried but I never had to deal with it.

I was a stranger in a strange land when I entered. I am a Cleveland, Ohio Jew. During my entire time at Clemson from 1970-1975 there were more Jewish members of the faculty then Jewish students. I was good with that. I was coming from a public high school that was 95% Jewish. There was no one else at Clemson with that experience. I embraced my uniqueness. One of the reasons I chose Clemson was that I wanted a “real world” experience and Clemson was more like the real world than Beachwood High School.

But the main reason I chose Clemson was for the adventure. And what an adventure I had there. I didn’t know a single person when I got there. I was somewhat of a campus personality by the time I graduated. I became an actor, I had a part in a movie and, most importantly, I made friends that I am still friends with today.

I LOVE CLEMSON and everything about it. The campus is beautiful and the climate is the best in the US east of the Mississippi River. When I hear Tiger Rag, my heart races.

EMBRACE THE ADVENTURE. Clemson will be a big part of the story of your life. Make it a story that you love to tell.

All that said, I now have to be the me that Clemson helped shape. I am a poet and humorist. I am currently working on writing projects for my genre of choice – the limerick. So when I saw the post on the Clemson Facebook page asking for the best advice I could offer an incoming freshman, my silly side decided that after I offered some real advice worth every cent that the new incoming freshmen paid for it and less, I needed to offer something to help ease the tension of being away from home for the first time and living with a stranger in a communal setting. After all, college is a place for first experiences and there is good chance that an incoming freshman might have this one.

Which led to this –

If you’re new to the dorm life game,
You’ll find that it’s anything but tame.
It could be terrifying
When roomie’s self gratifying….
Step back and ask, “Does that hand have a name?”