A “Trump Effect Economy” Limerick

Things like Hope and Change drive markets. This election has left everyone hoping in one way or another and bracing for the change that lies ahead, especially because that change is in the hands of someone who is not a career politician, has chutzpah out the ying yang and charisma that is undeniable.

The stock market has gone up since Donald Trump was elected. That’s a fact. But what made it happen? I have heard it called a Trump Bump. Positive vibes of hope and change. Maybe. And that led to this –

The stock market’s risen since Trump’s victory.
Is he a boon to the economy?
Is this a trending Trump bump
Or a Donald dry hump……
The world is waiting to see!

An “It’s Rigged If I Lose and I Won’t Accept The Results And Now It’s Rigged That I Won and The Other Side Won’t Accept The Results” Limerick


Donald J. Trump ‏@realDonaldTrump Twitter

In addition to winning the Electoral College in a landslide, I won the popular vote if you deduct the millions of people who voted illegally.

Recount momentum is starting to mount
And Trump’s Twitter rant is tantamount
To putting the blame
For his rigged election claim
On illegal votes(?) impossible to count…..or prove.

An “Appointments Point To An ‘Organized’ Administration” Limerick

I am an optimist by nature. I always try to see the good in things and a way to turn problems into opportunities. One of my catch phrases is “No mess is as bad as it looks.” I’m beginning to wonder.

What I am beginning to sense is that the American people who voted for Donald Trump weren’t looking for the next F.D.R. who would try to advance modern American society and address the need for positive social change in a world where technology is moving at warp speed. No, they don’t want a President with a conscience which is needed to lead our great diverse mass society, they want a Godfather who will protect the old neighborhood. Now they are going to find out what the price is for that “protection” and the character of the thugs entrusted to reel in the “tribute” for a Godfather. These are political creatures anxious to make their bones, if they haven’t already. On the street, they are dangerous people, feared, not respected.

Bannon, Flynn, Pompeo and Sessions fit the description and they have all kissed the ring. Now they are being rewarded for their loyalty to the Trumpfather with old neighborhoods that they will get to “protect” through intimidation. Territories called the Justice Department, the State Department and the CIA. Bannon is consigliere.

While I was thinking about how to put a positive spin on this, and as of this time, I have yet to do so, this popped into my head –

Trump’s appointments have me in a daze
They show he’s set in his “loyalty” ways.
He’s just letting us know
He’ll strive to reach a new low…..
And take us back to the bad old days!

A “Day After The Election” Limerick

I have been off the limerick trail for a while, even though the campaign trail is a gold mine for material. However, I have not found this to be an election that I wanted to write jokes about. It is, seriously, not a joking matter. I have never seen an election like this and, God willing, I will not see another one like it.

I am not a person that would express a political opinion on social media. It is not my place for that. I read a lot of political opinion on social media and it reinforces my decision to go Abe Lincoln – Better to remain silent and thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.

I will make a prediction about tomorrow, Election Day 2016. I predict there are going to be a lot of people in this country consuming a great deal of booze and weed. America will be doing some drinking and copping a buzz. Tomorrow is going to be a numbing experience for many.

Which means that America is going to wake up on Wednesday with a hangover. I was thinking about this while folding my laundry and when I opened my underwear drawer, this popped into my head.

You can’t say “No” to “Just one more.”
So you wake up aching and sore.
And then your universe
Only gets worse…..
You have an empty underwear drawer.

A Presidential Election Limerick

It’s an election year. Lucky us. 350 million people get to pick the one person to be the leader of the free world. Most of those people will not participate in the process. Many can’t due to being under the voting age or being too old to get to the polls. But the majority of non-participants think that their voice will not be heard and their vote doesn’t really count. And they may be right. I have written about this previously. Almost 2500 years ago, Aristotle said that Democracy is the lowest form of government – to paraphrase his reasoning, it’s the inmates running the asylum.

And the choices we are given this year. Oy vey. The two party system has a way of giving us the best sound bites and in an era where style has replaced substance, what you see does not come close to what you get. Which reminds me of something all of our fathers warned us about when we were growing up in the form of this old saying, “Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear.”

I woke up at 2AM with most of this banging around between my ears….

Elections are about making choices
From the din of ideological voices.
Is this Democracy’s dirge
Or will someone emerge
As a leader in whom the whole world rejoices?

According to the racing form, it’s a longshot at best!

A Six Line (Yes, it took six lines for this one!) State of The Union Limerick

I try to keep my limericks light and use them for jokes about relationships, sex, marriage, and getting old which are things that I know just enough about to be able to write my dumb jokes. But every so often, current events or some other serious thing causes me to think and reflect and make an observation and/or comment. I did that when the government was on the brink of shutting down because the partisan politics in Congress chose to butt heads rather than seek solutions. What this country now has is a very small number of buttheads (relative to the population of this great country) elected by an even relatively smaller number of citizens making decisions and laws that effect 350 million people in this country and around the world. This small powerful group exercise their rights to participate in the political process by buying elected officials on every level of government. And those bought and paid for elected public servants (?) are obligated to the smallest minority in the country, the people who garner power by using their wealth and influence to put their people into these positions of power. It is mind boggling to me.

I was thinking about this yesterday and this popped into my head. It was so disturbing that my creative process went into warp. I found myself in a parking lot writing it down and I realized that five lines was not going to do it. I wound up writing a mutant limerick about our mutant political situation. Trump is a mutant, right? But so Is Obama. Cover your heads and grab your ass – it’s election time.

Zealots claim to know what God would say.
And, of course, politics get in the way.
If our founding fathers only knew
Power would be held by so few…..
Smart people do stupid things every day
And it always has been and will be that way!