“The Last Matzo Ball Soup” Limerick….maybe

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, I was an adult Cub Scout leader. There is nothing unusual about that other than my only child is a girl, she was between 14 & 16 at the time and living 1200 miles away. I was in Houston working with a good friend helping him grow his business and at the same time, by choice, also helping him grow his children. He has four boys and at one time, when they were all very young, they all had some type of special needs. They have all grown up to be wonderful young men and I an glad that I had a hand in it in some small way. My friend was an Eagle Scout growing up and he still is an active adult scout leader with one of the largest and most successful Jewish Boy Scout troops in the country, measured by the number of Eagle Scouts that the troop has produced. When I got involved, it was with his twin boys who were in the first or second grade (I can’t remember that far back – 16 years) and they were going to be Wolf cub scouts. I stuck with them for four years through their graduation from cub scouts. I was an assistant den leader and I enjoyed the experience very much. I liked being a positive influence on the boys and I made a lot of friends. And I like camping…now. Before I got involved with scouts, the only time I remember sleeping out under the stars was back in college and what I remember about it was waking up and wondering how I got there.

And having to be an adult and a role model did not stop me from being the goofball that I am. I took an advanced adult training course when the boys became Webelos. During the training with other adult leaders, we had to form our own patrol or den and, at my suggestion, we became the Mime Patrol. We had a wild but soundless cheer. After we finished the training, when we went back to our den, our den became the Mime Patrol. A friend of mine made us an outrageous flag with a mime face and hands on it. It was great.

During the course of the year, every den was responsible for providing entertainment for a monthly pack meeting. I had the boys perform a limerick – what else??? I took what is arguably the most famous limerick ever written and gave it a Jewish spin and changed it from a XXX rating to a G rating. Still, you should have seen the jaws drop when the boys did the first line – “There once was a man from Pawtucket.”

My original G rated version went like this:

There once was a man from Pawtucket
Who ate matzo ball soup by the bucket.
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin….

And I can’t remember whatever lame last line I came up with and I have been trying to finish it for the last 16 years with something that actually works and makes sense. Last night in the middle of the night, it came to me. I have been working on getting our taxes together lately which must have put this into my head. Two different versions came to me and it is truly my pleasure to share them with you now.

There once was a man from Pawtucket
Who ate matzo ball soup from a bucket.
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin,
“I wish I could expense and deduct it”

There once was a man from Pawtucket
Who ate matzo ball soup by the bucket.
He said, “I wish I could
Make it my livelihood…
Then when I buy my soup, I’d deduct it!”

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One thought on ““The Last Matzo Ball Soup” Limerick….maybe

  1. that’s a little close to a ribald one I might have heard in the past 🙂

    Living in near synogoges and deli’s in Cleveland taught me this:

    the matzo consistency is gross
    until you acquire a large enough dose
    but take this Jewish pennicilian
    it’s both amazing and fufilling
    and will bring your sniffles to a close

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